40 Reasons to Speed

 

HEAR YE HEAR YE

The Queen thus decrees: these quadragesimal may now be considered, but are not decreed fully legally, allowable, as moral in their justifications to give allowance to the conscience of the charioteer, as well as the other charioteers who may understand and know that the justice of endangerment to life and limb by the exceeding of the self-imposed forward momentum limitation provided in writing by the queen's own hand and written as a miles per hour measurement along the Queen's highways and avenues, is wholly understandable given that the other charioteers of metal and oil circumspectly and diligently work and plan to reduce in number the occurrence of those and these emergencies or hurried circumstances.

Poop

Pee

Vomit

Bleeding

Having a baby

You have learned that your house is on fire

There is a wildfire coming

There is a flood coming

A tornado is coming

Your mom is dying

A criminal is chasing you

A fake police is chasing you

A real police is chasing you

You are at gunpoint

You will win money for a race

Hate driving slow

To pass another car

A moose is chasing you

You have a life-saving vaccine

All four of your tires are losing air quickly

The light just turned yellow

There is a large pothole that you have to make it over

God told you to

You have an appointment

A hot girl/guy wants to "hang out"

A drawbridge is opening

A train is coming

An asteroid is coming for your city

A nuclear weapon just went off

You believe that it is morally imperative that every movement is as quick as possible to take advantage of the one life that you have to live

You are driving through Kansas

MrBeast is giving $1,000,000 to the first person to touch the glass cube full of 1,000,000 $1 bills

You forgot your curfew

Your spouse just sent you a spicy text

Just being in a hurry

Bad time management

You see that another car is about to crash into a baby that just crawled into the road and you want to crash into the car to prevent it from running over the small child

You're late for dinner

To get less hail damage

A large boulder is rolling down the hill 

Leaving work as fast as possible

Let it henceforth be known that all people of the Book, and those whose names are scribed by both wisdom and charity, are fully responsible for the safety of their chariots, both of the damages caused to other chariots as well as damages to the property owned by fellow citizens of this sovereign land as well as the great and noble Queen's properties. Only under these circumstances will moral understanding and allowance be given to those who seek to minimize the occurrence of these temptations by otherwise taking full responsibility for the planning, preparation, education and calm perseverance of their lives as well as the lives of the citizens they choose to fraternize with and establish brotherly bonds with.

Established this 354th day of the first year of the Annus Reginae (1 AR)